This week has been a struggle for me. I have not been able to get my thoughts organized until just this morning. We enjoyed a nice, relaxed pace to our days during the two weeks that surrounded the Christmas and New Years holidays. This week, we were suppose to return to normal. The problem is that I am not even certain what normal is for us. I often joke that our family has never been accused of being normal. All jokes aside, it took me until this morning to realize that I was expecting to accomplish an impossible feat. Our family had no intentions of returning to normal. So much has changed for us now. I am not certain we will ever return to our previous way of life, but I know it definitely isn't happening this week.
No wonder I feel like I am spinning my wheels but not going anywhere.
This morning it dawned on me that we are blazing a new routine.
It starts with a new pace. Last year, we bounced from one crisis to another. This year we are in planning and discipline mode. We are paying attention to sleep, fitness, hydration, and nutrition, so that our bodies are in the better shape to endure the stress ahead. We are taking the time to visit the doctor and the dentist, instead of ignoring pains and problems. We are budgeting every aspect of our life.
This week the kids' activities are in full swing. We are returning to activities, to a lessened amount. As previous activities ended, we let them go. We did not sign up for anything new this year. At first, we chose this change so that all activities would be completed by the time Jersey #2 is scheduled for surgery. We did not want have to pull her out of activities, in order to have surgery, and have her to feel as though she were being punished for having a heart condition.
Now, we realize it is essential that she have a reduced activity schedule, due to the exercise intolerance symptom that continues to worsen in her. Our daily routine now places the limit of 1 public activity per day. My husband and I alter our schedule so that she may rest at home the remainder of the day and night. It is easy to stick to this restriction, because any attempt to push that limit results in her breaking down in a puddle of tears from exhaustion. No activity is worth that.
I now do our grocery shopping in the late evenings, or on weekends. My husband will run errands on his lunch break. We take turns attending evening church services, so that one of us can be home. The Referee pays more attention to wrap up his work day consistently, so that he can be home in the evenings.....or be the one to run that evening's errands. We are working as a team. (Teamwork is something that has been missing from our marriage for a few years now, so it is a great blessing to have it return). We do not buy anything outside our basic-needs budget. We are saving every spare penny for upcoming medical expenses.
During the day, I've learned to implement an hour of quiet time, with the children in their beds, reading, napping, or playing quietly, so that Jersey #2 can rest. We moved bedtime up to 8pm. I'm figuring out a smoother meal and snack schedule so that she can maintain steady energy. It sounds like I am setting up a routine for a toddler, instead of a 6-year old...which might explain why the younger siblings are just thriving in this new lifestyle.
Our new family routine certainly revolves around the specific needs of 1 family member. It amazes me how the entire family is adapting and growing just as well. Understanding the need to change our way of life was easy. Implementing it naturally, without setting her apart as a target, was challenging at first. Each little change immediately improved her health and disposition, so we knew we were on the right track. Observing the younger 3 children settle right into the relaxed pace, has been encouraging. Inviting friends over to play, or letting our oldest go over to a friend's house to play on occasion, adds variety. Experiencing our marriage grow in teamwork has been wonderful. Seeing the blessings pour out of this challenge, has been priceless.
No wonder I feel like I am spinning my wheels but not going anywhere.
This morning it dawned on me that we are blazing a new routine.
It starts with a new pace. Last year, we bounced from one crisis to another. This year we are in planning and discipline mode. We are paying attention to sleep, fitness, hydration, and nutrition, so that our bodies are in the better shape to endure the stress ahead. We are taking the time to visit the doctor and the dentist, instead of ignoring pains and problems. We are budgeting every aspect of our life.
This week the kids' activities are in full swing. We are returning to activities, to a lessened amount. As previous activities ended, we let them go. We did not sign up for anything new this year. At first, we chose this change so that all activities would be completed by the time Jersey #2 is scheduled for surgery. We did not want have to pull her out of activities, in order to have surgery, and have her to feel as though she were being punished for having a heart condition.
Now, we realize it is essential that she have a reduced activity schedule, due to the exercise intolerance symptom that continues to worsen in her. Our daily routine now places the limit of 1 public activity per day. My husband and I alter our schedule so that she may rest at home the remainder of the day and night. It is easy to stick to this restriction, because any attempt to push that limit results in her breaking down in a puddle of tears from exhaustion. No activity is worth that.
I now do our grocery shopping in the late evenings, or on weekends. My husband will run errands on his lunch break. We take turns attending evening church services, so that one of us can be home. The Referee pays more attention to wrap up his work day consistently, so that he can be home in the evenings.....or be the one to run that evening's errands. We are working as a team. (Teamwork is something that has been missing from our marriage for a few years now, so it is a great blessing to have it return). We do not buy anything outside our basic-needs budget. We are saving every spare penny for upcoming medical expenses.
During the day, I've learned to implement an hour of quiet time, with the children in their beds, reading, napping, or playing quietly, so that Jersey #2 can rest. We moved bedtime up to 8pm. I'm figuring out a smoother meal and snack schedule so that she can maintain steady energy. It sounds like I am setting up a routine for a toddler, instead of a 6-year old...which might explain why the younger siblings are just thriving in this new lifestyle.
Our new family routine certainly revolves around the specific needs of 1 family member. It amazes me how the entire family is adapting and growing just as well. Understanding the need to change our way of life was easy. Implementing it naturally, without setting her apart as a target, was challenging at first. Each little change immediately improved her health and disposition, so we knew we were on the right track. Observing the younger 3 children settle right into the relaxed pace, has been encouraging. Inviting friends over to play, or letting our oldest go over to a friend's house to play on occasion, adds variety. Experiencing our marriage grow in teamwork has been wonderful. Seeing the blessings pour out of this challenge, has been priceless.
This morning I realized that we are not going to return to normal this week. The first requirement to achieve that goal would be to establish normal first....and then return to it. Our family has never been accused of being normal.
No wonder you're feeling so out of sorts, it's a huge change you guys are making. Here's hoping it feels totally normal to you in no time at all!
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