Favorite Blanket

I have been on a quest for a new favorite blanket for Jersey #2. I think success was found this week! She is conducting a trial run of her new blanket, to make sure it is the right fit. As soon as her test run is complete, I will be buying extras of that exact blanket.

It is not normal to find a favorite blanket for a 6-year old. But, we have never been accused of being normal. She is our only child who took to a favorite blanket. Desperate times call for drastic measures.

When Jersey #2 was born, my sister sent us a Carters Starters bug blanket, as part of her baby gift. My sister is a huge fan of Carters baby items, and she thought the lady bugs were really cute. She liked this soft blanket so much that she bought herself one for my niece who was also born that year. She also bought one for our other sister, saving it for the day she started a family.

I took the blanket with us on our trip to California for Jersey #2's first heart surgery. When she was taken off the respirator and put in a larger hospital bed, the nurse covered her with the blanket, trying to bring some comfort from home.

Little did we know, that would be the start of the "bug blanket" obsession. That blanket certainly brought Jersey #2 comfort in the hospital. It brought comfort on the airplane. It brought comfort in the car. It instantly became her favorite blanket. She preferred this blanket for all nap times and bed times. No other blanket calmed her the way her bug blanket did.

Realizing that she was attached to this specific blanket, I set out to purchase more. I had no idea how long this obsession would last, but the blanket was already starting to show wear. By this time, Carters had come out with an entirely new nursery bedding collection and was no longer making this specific blanket. I put my sisters on watch for any in stores. My sister found 1 more at a store in her town and bought it for me. That was all we could find.

I rotated the 2 bug blankets for over 2 years. As she approached 3 years old, I was starting to grow concerned that her attachment to her bug blanket was not going to fade any time soon, but the blankets were wearing thin. I begged my sisters to give me the bug blankets they each had, and I promised to buy them brand new plush nursery blankets in return. Both sisters graciously donated their bug blankets to their niece, as none of their children were attached to a single blanket like that.

I have been able to rotate the 4 bug blankets for the past 3 years. The attachment has not reduced at all. Jersey #2 requests to have her bug blanket in her arms, next to her cheek when we tuck her into bed each night. She has been given a slew of blankets through the years, but it is the bug blanket that she carries to the living room to watch TV. It is the bug blanket that she takes in the car when she is nervous about visiting the doctor.

Those 4 bug blankets are extremely thin now. I am certain they are not going to last much longer. As we face another trip to the Children's Hospital for heart surgery, I thought it was time to find a new blanket.

I informed Jersey #2 that we would be buying her a new blanket to take with her for her upcoming heart surgery. I am thinking that if the first surgery inspired the attachment to the bug blanket, then a 2nd surgery will help transfer the attachment to a new blanket. She had to help me pick it out. We went on a quest for a blanket that was as soft and as cute as her bug blanket. I touched baby blankets in every single store I shopped in for a full month before I took her along. I browsed options online too. This week, we set out to find the perfect blanket. Jersey #2 enjoyed the journey.

She found a cute, soft blanket with pink and brown polk-a-dots. I thought that was fitting, because she loves vibrant colors and polk-a-dots. It turns out the new blanket is made by Carters too.

I bought 2 of this same blanket, because the store was running a buy 1 get 1 half off sale. We brought the blankets home, opened them up, and compared them to the bug blanket. They are nearly the same size, thickness, and feel. The bug blanket is slightly more rectangular in shape, where the polk-a-dot blanket is more square. Their similarities are astounding.

I am pleased. It looks like we may have found THE best blanket to transition to a new favorite blanket. Jersey #2 started out bringing both blankets out to the living room to watch TV. Occasionally, I see she only has the polk-a-dot blanket with her. I am going to give her a couple days before I slip the bug blankets into the wash and into the back of the closet. If the polk-a-dot blanket really does win her heart, I plan to buy a few more before they go out of production. I hope the polk-a-dot blanket brings her as much comfort from home, while she is in the hospital, as her bug blanket did in the first place.

So far, so good...

For the Love of Dogs

This is Taylor.

She is our beloved pet dog. She is an 11-year old Terrier mix. She was a pound puppy, and we adopted her when she was only around 8 weeks old. She is a great dog. She is gentle with kids, very protective of our home and family, and rather lazy and low maintenance.

A few months ago, Taylor developed a bad cough. We were dreading the diagnosis, because a chronic cough in an old dog is often a symptom of heart worms, or some heart or lung infection. Taylor was functioning well in spite of the cough, so I put off the dreaded vet visit a little while. I blamed finances, but part of me really didn't want to face the end of her life already.

We saved up the money for the vet bill, so I decided to call and make her an appointment. The lost-cost vet clinic where we normally take her for vaccinations referred us to a full-service clinic up the road.

I hauled 5 kids and 1 dog into this new vet clinic, ready for the worst. I was dreading the diagnosis. I was dreading the pressure to give all kinds of very expensive treatments and procedures to a very old dog. I was dreading having to explain it all to the children.

It turns out that my experience with this vet clinic was fantastic! I will now be a regular customer, because I was just that impressed. The staff were friendly right from the start. They requested basic information in advance, and settled us into an exam room right away. The vet tech greeted the kids and talked to them about their dog, just like he talked to me. I was impressed that he included the kids in the whole visit. He asked some questions and collected some data on Taylor's overall health.

I spent a few minutes trying to explain to Jersey #4 that the dog has to see a dog doctor, not her pediatrician. The whole concept of a veterinarian (a dog doctor) was intriguing to the kids. They started drilling me for details of what kinds of animals a veterinarian can treat. They then had to clarify which kinds of animals were treated at that particular clinic (after we established that giraffes do not come to the clinic, but remain at the zoo).

The veterinarian entered the room with a friendly greeting as well. He asked questions and listened to Taylor's lungs. He was very clear spoken as he explained the path of tests and treatments that he wanted to take. He was very reasonable in requesting the simplest of tests that would rule out the most, up front. I liked his style. I agreed to have her blood drawn for a heart worms test, and also to have a chest x-ray taken. The vet was very honest about the diseases and infections he was suspecting, and what needed to be ruled out before any treatments were started. I like that style for my our human health care needs, so it was really nice to have that same experience with the veterinarian.

I really appreciated when the vet tech asked my permission to trim the dog's nails. I have had experience with a vet clinic adding procedures and treatments on their whim, without consulting me, yet still giving me the bill. This vet clinic was very good about securing my authorization before beginning any tests or treatments. It was to my advantage that they offered to trim her nails, because she is an excitable dog who is difficult to trim.

I was so relieved when the veterinarian returned with a non-fatal diagnosis! The heart worms test was negative. He showed us the chest x-ray, which revealed a normal-sized heart, and healthy lungs. She has no visible tumors or growths. He suggested her cough is a result of bronchitis. He gave me a prescription for an antibiotic with steroid, and assured me that the medication should make a very noticeable difference in less than a week. If not, I needed to bring her back in. While he was saying good-bye, the veterinarian asked the kids if there was no school today. When I explained that we home school, he smiled at the kids and said well then this outing was a lesson today. What a great comment.

I was so pleased with the level of care and with the diagnosis. Even though veterinary costs seem so expensive, I did not feel troubled by the bill. I had authorized every test and treatment, so I knew what to expect when the bill arrived. While I wrote out the check for payment, one of the vet techs complimented the children's behavior. I had to chuckle, because a split second after her compliment, Jersey #5 climbed onto the dog scale to weigh himself. So, I praised the older kids for their behavior, and joked that we were still training the toddler.

We left the clinic with our wonderful old dog, thankful to have more time with her. I tried giving her the first dose of medication in a piece of bread, as the veterinarian suggested. The kids enjoyed watching her eat the entire piece of bread and still drop the pill onto the ground. So, I had to break out a hot dog and stuff her pill inside. That worked. It looks like she will get to enjoy a hot dog treat twice a day this week.

Be My Valentine

Our family enjoys holiday traditions. Regardless if the source of the holiday is patriotic, religious, or secular, we enjoy celebrations. Our children are quite spoiled by having grandparents who add to the holiday excitement. We had fun celebrating Valentine's Day.

(I will admit that I do not know the true origin of Valentine's Day, and have always thought it was a materialistic holiday made-up by the flower shops or the greeting card creators).

Granny & PawPaw are always early with their holiday greetings. Considering their career in the military, the running joke is if you are on time, you are late! They take that seriously. So, the greeting cards in pink and red envelopes arrived in the mail on Thursday.

It is always an exciting mail call to find letters from Granny! She takes great care to sign each card, and include stickers, a balloon, and a dollar for each grandchild.

Nana takes the time to make every holiday special too. She emailed me advanced notice that a box of goodies would be arriving soon. She takes great care to pick out a little gift and some candy for the kids. I intercepted the box and hid it until Friday night when The Referee arrived home from his business trip, so that he could enjoy watching the kids open their Valetnine's box from his Mom.

The box was filled with character Valentine's cards, DumDum lollipops (a huge hit at our house), and a coloring book for each child....

And, did I mention that each grandchild received a Valentine card addressed to them from Nana which also included $2.....

Saturday night, after the kids were asleep, I set out their Valentine gifts from The Referee and me, to be discovered Valentine's morning. In addition to a box of candy, the older 4 received a pack of underwear, and the baby received a pack of pacifiers.....

At first, I was really proud of my practical gift. Two of the children were starting to grow into a larger size, and needed new underwear. Later, I got to thinking that underwear may not be the brightest idea for Valentine's Day. What if they decided to show off their gifts to friends, while wearing them? Oops.

The candy and new underwear were a big hit. Everyone put on a new pair of underwear to wear to church that morning. Thankfully, no one showed them off to anyone else! Whew! Next year, I will think of a different practical gift.

We enjoyed some chocolate with breakfast....

I was very amused that The Referee surprised me with a pack of candy which was the exact same thing I bought for him--Reeses Peanut Butter Hearts. We both enjoy them. Since we each received a pack, we didn't even have to share.

I hope your Valentine's Day was filled with love and chocolate too.

Actually, I prefer to have ALL of my days filled with love and chocolate...

Tag

Life is absolutely crazy right now.

It is as if my husband and I are involved in this giant game of tag. We have so many activities going on, that we are to the point of tagging each other when it is time to shift the responsibility.

The Referee was on travel of his job for 5 days last week. It was only suppose to be 4 days, but snowy weather canceled many air travel schedules, and he was stranded an extra day. I held down the home-front. I am not meant to be a single parent. I require more sleep than that. My husband arrived home late in the evening on Friday. We managed to eat dinner and put the kids to bed, before we both dropped into bed ourselves, from sheer exhaustion.

We were up early Saturday morning. That was the day of the last basketball games of this season. We were signed up to bring snacks for Jersey #2's team, so I was up early to pack snack goody bags, pack the diaper bag, set out clothes for the kids, and write out checks for the bills. We loaded the family up in the van and headed out early, so we could stop off at the bank and pay the mortgage.

The Referee was the referee for Jersey #2's game, as well as the 3 games that followed, that day. He literally ran up and down a basketball court for 4 hours! I got to watch half of Jersey #2's game before I had to load up the remaining 4 children and shuttle Jersey #1 to her game. I dropped her off in the care of her coach, and drove back to the first gym to pick up Jersey #2. I arrived just in time for the team Mom to announce plans for an end-of-season party, and her desire to collect money for the coach's gift. I ran out to the van to grab some cash out of my wallet for the gift, and ran back into the gym. I checked in with The Referee, and let him know I was taking Jersey #2 with me, and was now responsible for all of our children.

Tag....I'm it!

I drove over to the gym where Jersey #1 was playing her final game. I arrived at half-time. Since I am the team Mom for her team, I then helped the coach give out awards, and reminded the team (and their parents) about the end-of-season party I had planned. I gathered all 5 of my kids and headed out to the van.

While the Referee was busy being the referee for 2 more games, I took the kids with me to Jiffy Lube to get the oil changed in the van. They were quick and they had popcorn for the kids to snack on while we waited.

We returned to the gym to watch the last half of the final game. The kids swarmed The Referee when the game was over. We loaded back up in the van and drove to Dollar Tree to let the kids spend their Valentine's dollars from their grandparents.

The Referee received a call that he was needed to drive a run for that shuttle side-job he has. He decided to eat and take a nap, so he would be rested for the late night driving. I had the kids help me straighten the house and complete some light cleaning, while The Referee napped. He hugged and kissed us good-bye and went to work. I fed the kids and got them ready for bed.

The Referee made it home Sunday morning with just enough time to shower and help me load up the kids in the van for church. I think we spent more time together sitting next to each other in the pew at Sunday school than we had been able to spend together all week! That time was cut short when The Referee worked the audio/visual booth during the morning church service. Just before he went up to the booth, he informed me that we could not doddle after church, because his side-job duties ran earlier than anticipated.

We returned home after church, whipped up a quick lunch, and The Referee was off to work again, with another shuttle run. Jersey #1 had a friend over for the afternoon, to get ready to spend the night at her house that evening. I took care of the kids and balanced the monthly budget.

The Referee returned home just before bedtime and helped me put the kids to bed. I had to set the alarm to wake me up early, because I had to report for jury duty first thing this morning!

Tag....He's it!

The Referee spent the day home with the kids, while I spend the day at the courthouse, serving on the grand jury. He was concerned about checking in at work, since he had been away all last week. On my lunch break, we ran over to his workplace, so he could make a brief appearance and check the status of a few things. He had driven me to the courthouse this morning, because I when I went to back out of the driveway in his car, the rear view mirror fell off into my hand and we did not have time to fix it just then. His chauffeuring me worked out great, because I could stay in the van with the kids while he ran into work for a few minutes.

When The Referee picked me up from court at the end of the day, the first thing he told me was that he has no idea how I ever manage to get anything else done while taking care of the kids all day! He never found the time to shower.

Court let out late, so we only had 2 hours before The Referee had to go drive for another shuttle run. We decided to race through 2 stores to complete our grocery shopping. We spoiled the kids with a candy at the end, because they were such troopers and behaved so well through it all. We returned home and unloaded the groceries. The Referee jumped into the shower while I put groceries away.

I corralled the younger kids into the bathtub while he changed the light bulb in the playroom. Then, he was off to work again, driving a shuttle run. I got the kids into their PJs and let them watch a Veggie Tales DVD while I ate a very late dinner.

The Referee will be home late tonight. He has to set an alarm to get himself up early tomorrow to return to his regular job. He has to work 10-hours a day for the next 4 days, to make up for the fact that he was home with the kids today, so I could report for jury duty.

I return to homeschooling, home-making, and childcare tomorrow. Plus, I am hosting Jersey #1's basketball team party. This whole week is filled with activities. I would say that things should mellow out by next Sunday, but we've been told that the shuttle business is booming right now, and the week is full. So, The Referee will probably be going strong next weekend too. So, as far as the home-front is concerned.....

Tag....I'm it!

Heart Friends

A few months ago, Jersey #2 expressed a great desire to have a friend who was also a heart patient. She was struggling with being so different, and wanted a friend who understood what she was going through.

Her prayers have been answered.

Little did we know, this cowboy who helped her over come her fear of riding a horse, is also a heart patient...

This is Cowboy Max. He and his wife founded Galloping Grace Youth Ranch. They specialize in providing joy to families by bringing children and horses together.

We met Cowboy Max, and a couple of their horses at a Pumpkin Stand fundraiser last October. These pictures of Jersey #2 riding a horse were from that day. She debated back and forth about whether or not to attempt to ride. She has always been fearful, even of little pony rides. But, the excitement that Jersey #1 and Jersey #3 displayed about the opportunity to ride a horse, was so contagious that she put on a helmet and stood in line for her turn.

She almost changed her mind when it was her turn to ride. Cowboy Max was patient and encouraging. He won her trust immediately. She let him lift her into the saddle, but he picked up on her fear right away. In the picture above, he is telling her that the horse does not even have to move forward. She can just sit there for a moment if she'd like. She liked that!

After just a minute of conversation, he had convinced her to relax a little, enjoy herself, and try letting the horse take a step.

This had to have been the slowest walk around a corral I have ever seen. They certainly gave me plenty of photo opportunities. I was so thrilled to see Jersey #2 overcoming her fear and riding a horse!

Our children had a second opportunity to ride these horses at the Christmas tree corral fundraiser in December. Jersey #2 was very eager to ride again, and was less nervous. I contacted the Ranch to express my appreciation, and also requested our children be added to their roster for next season.

I have been secretly hoping that being around the horses and taking a few riding lessons will be a great distraction for Jersey #2 as she prepares for heart surgery. I also came across a lapbook curriculum about horses that I thought would complement the focus.

I am not yet clear if the time line of when the Ranch opens for the season, versus when her heart surgery will be scheduled, will cooperate with my goals.

I was just blown away a few weeks ago, when the Ranch sent out an email about the success of this past season. The email explained that their year started with Cowboy Max recovering from open-heart surgery to replace a valve in his heart. I was able to show the email and pictures to Jersey #2. She was thrilled to learn that Cowboy Max is a heart patient too....and he had a valve replacement, just like she will.

She has a friend who is a heart patient. She is no longer alone in her journey.

I emailed the Ranch again, to tell them how much they have blessed our family already. It did my heart good to see a need be met for my daughter. I could not contain my joy for this answered prayer.

Cowboy Max responded and said he would be honored to be Jersey #2's heart friend.

It is just amazing to me the way God places the right people in our lives at the right time. Who knew that the same cowboy who helped Jersey #2 overcome her fear of riding a horse would also help her face her fear of open-heart surgery!

Food & Finances Friday--Income Taxes

I am just boggled by the details of filing our income taxes. Our financial circumstances are not very complex, yet I am no good at predicting what to expect each year. It is probably a good thing that I am not a tax adviser of any sort.

Years ago, we heard the advice that it is best to not get a big tax refund. It is smarter to keep that money in the paycheck and prevent the government from banking on all of its interest. That sounded logical. It was fun to get a return instead of having to pay in, though. So, we didn't spend too much energy trying to make our taxes break even.

Until this past tax year.

When I took a seminar through Crown Financial Ministries, my eyes were opened a little further. One of the budget scenarios that we studied had a couple who were struggling to make ends meet. The instructor explained how they were advised to increase their exemptions in order to have less taxes taken out of their paychecks. The additional money in each paycheck from that point clearly helped balance their budget.

That was just the example I needed to help me see the benefit of not getting a large tax refund. My husband immediately altered his exemptions to have less tax money taken out of his paychecks. It helped our monthly budget tremendously.

Since the changes were not implemented right at the start of the tax year, and since I do not have the tax code figured out that well, we were still expecting a refund after filing our taxes this year. It was expected to be a much smaller refund than before.

Except that it turned out to be a much larger refund than expected. This time it is not as fun as in the past, but instead it is a huge relief. A HUGE relief. It is an answer to prayer. The amount equals the amount of out-of-pocket expense we are anticipating having to pay for medical expenses that our insurance won't cover.

All this time, I have been thinking that we will spend this whole year struggling to keep up with medical bills (much like life has been during the Fall and Winter months). Instead, we have just been blessed by filing our income taxes! How crazy is that?!?

Tetralogy of Fallot Basics

Jersey #2 was born with the heart defect Tetralogy of Fallot. The details of this defect are pictured in the above image that I borrowed from the American Heart Association's website. There are 4 parts (tetra)...in no particular order...

1. Ventricular Septal Defect: this is a hole between the two lower chambers (ventricles) of the heart.
   
2. Pulmonary Stenosis: a narrowing of the path where blood flows from the heart to the lungs.
3. Overriding Aorta: The major artery that carries oxygen-rich blood from the heart to the body is out of its place, sitting on top of the hole between the ventricles instead. This allows blood from both chambers (oxygenated and non-oxygenated) to mix together and flow to the body.
4. Hypertrophy of the Right Ventricle: the right lower chamber of the heart becomes more muscular, due to the extra work it does to try to push blood through the narrowing at the pulmonary valve.

This combination of problems means that not enough blood is able to get to the lungs to pick up oxygen, and blood with low oxygen levels is sent out to the body. This results in a bluish (cyanotic) appearance, because the body's oxygen saturation levels are lower than normal.

Tetralogy of Fallot must be repaired with open-heart surgery. If left untreated, this condition is fatal. The technology and abilities of the cardiology field have boomed tremendously within the past 4 decades. As a result, babies born with this defect are now able to have all 4 components repaired in 1 single surgery.

Jersey #2 underwent open-heart surgery when she was only 2.5 months old. Surgery lasted 6 hours. She was on the ventilator (breathing tube) for the first 24 hours following surgery. She spent 4 days in Intensive Care, followed by 4 days in the pediatric cardiology ward of the hospital. Her recovery was on the quick end of the spectrum.

The surgeon identified the source of her pulmonary stenosis to be a very underdeveloped pulmonary valve. He had to cut through the valve in order to open up that narrowing to allow blood to flow to the lungs. He left her with a transanular patch to work in place of a pulmonary valve. He was hoping it would take her to adulthood. It lasted 6 years.

Now, she needs a new pulmonary valve to be placed in her heart. This is the open-heart surgery we are facing in a few months.

Photo Opportunity

It is often difficult to get a nice picture of multiple children together. I find it is near-impossible to get all 5 of mine to look at the camera and smile at the same time.

For some strange reason, I still try.

Periodically, I make an attempt to get a nice group photo of my children together, with me as the photographer. It is always an adventure. Sometimes, it even borders on torture (for me).

This past weekend, I took the kids to a park and tried a few group shots in between some playground activity. I never got that perfect picture. I did get a few good ones. We also had a lot of fun.

I tried a variety of poses.

The circle of heads....

The slide train....

Sitting on a park bench in birth order....

Holding hands, strolling through the park....

I had better luck with individual photos. I might just have to save the challenge of group pictures for the professional photo studios.

Learning to Read

I believe that one of the greatest joys of homeschooling is getting to be an eyewitness when my children are learning to read. The gift of reading is one of the greatest academic accomplishments I can give my children. Our homeschooling focus begins with reading. The Referee and I hold firm to the idea that a person who can read well can learn anything. Holes in a person's educational history can be filled in by reading books (or even websites nowadays) on any subject matter.

Children who struggle with reading tend to struggle with confidence in learning. I have peers who admit to questioning their intelligence based on their reading challenges. I do not know the full connection between strength of reading and academic success, but I've heard enough personal accounts from friends and family to take note of this priority when educating my own children.

Our homeschool focus begins with the building blocks to reading. Identifying ABCs, followed by learning the phonetic sounds each letter makes. The curriculum we use introduces the short vowel sounds first. The next step is a blend of a single consonant with a single short vowel. It is a small step from a 2-letter blend to a 3-letter word. I know this phonics method only through the experience of my children learning to read, because I learned to sight read when I was a kid.

Something clicked with Jersey #3 and he is now starting to sound out 3-letter words. He has been able to identify his ABCs for a couple years now. I introduced the short vowel sounds last Fall, but they did not stick, so I gave it more time. A couple weeks ago, he started taking an interest again. The consonant sounds clicked with him faster. So, as soon as he had a breakthrough with a couple short vowels (a and o), he was able to blend.

I really like A Beka's phonics based reading program, so that is the curriculum we use. For the pre-K level, they offer little paper "readers" that are very colorful and only 10 pages long. The reader introduces a single letter on one page, a blend with that letter on the next page, and then a 3-letter word on the 3rd page. The children think they are reading, because they are learning these skills from a little book. It is so cute. The last page of the 3rd reader has a 3 word sentence. The amount of material in each reader is just enough to encourage the kid and build their confidence and excitement about reading, without exhausting them, so we end on a positive note. The number and difficulty of words increases as we go through the sequence of readers.

Learning to read appears to be a "2 steps forward, 1 step back" process. Jersey #3 went through 4 readers with me in one day, then sat and read 3 of those readers to his Dad that evening. I know that when we pick up the readers again, he will NOT be ready for the fifth one. We will start back through the 3rd or 4th one to review a little before moving on. If we move on too quickly, frustrations grow. A little review builds excitement, then he can learn new material with that positive momentum. This is how Jersey #2 learns as well, and the two of them appear to have some similarities in their learning style.

The Referee is very impressed that our son is learning to read already. We both are fairly certain that we learned to read in 1st grade. Jersey #1 learned to read a few months after turning 5. Jersey #2 learned a few months before her 5th birthday. Jersey #3 will be 5 in a couple months from now. Success is not found in the age of the child. It is found by being attentive to the readiness of the child. Each child is so different. They grow, develop, and mature at different rates. So, I have to keep an eye out for clues to their interest and readiness before I introduce a new academic skill. As hard as it is for me to do this, I have also had to learn to back off when they are clearly not ready for something, and give them more time before approaching it again.

With Jersey #1 I actually slowed her down, because I thought she was too young to learn to read. She figured out reading on her own. She learned her ABCs, and then the sounds each letter made. I didn't pull out any readers for her at 4 years old, so she started sounding out street signs. She sounded out "sun" off the Sunrise Apartments sign. That was my first clue that it was time to teach her to read. By kindergarten, she breezed right through those Pre-K readers the first day. She completed the kindergarten readers that first week. I laughed at myself for spending so much time researching the reading program I wanted to use, and then waiting too long to start it that she taught herself to read using street signs instead. So, I made sure to get out the reading program much sooner for Jersey #2.

Jersey #2 picked up blending 2 letters really well. She was a model reader for this curriculum. The funny thing about her is that even though she is beyond beginning reading books, she is resistant to read chapter books. She has no explanation, but just informs me that she does not like chapter books. She has sailed right through her entire 1st grade reading list, but digs in her heals to avoid the 2nd grade reading list. So, we started reading the chapter books on the 2nd grade list together, taking turns reading out loud to each other. One of the benefits of homeschooling is this ability to move forward at the student's pace, even when her resistance makes no sense to me whatsoever!

Magical 3

3-years old appears to be the magical age when my severely introverted children blossom into social maturity.

I have absolutely no scientific proof that there is any magic that comes with age 3. This is not universal for all children. Quite the contrary, Jersey #1 was an absolute handful as she was turning 3, and she was a social extrovert right from birth......actually, even in the womb she would wave and smile for the ultrasound camera. At age 3, she was very sassy.

But Jersey #3 and Jersey #4 are VERY introverted. Jersey #3 would enter hysterics if anyone held him other than his parents. It was rather shocking to take a 2-week old baby to church and have him scream if any of the ladies tried to hold him. Stranger anxiety does not usually surface that young. Technically, Jersey #3 did not go through a stranger anxiety stage.....he had stranger repulsion right from the start. He refused attention from anyone else other than his Mom or Dad for the first year of his life. It took him a while to warm up to grandparents. When he was just over a year old, he was drawn to a teen girl at our church, which finally gave us a babysitter! During his 1st birthday party, he went inside the toy playhouse and refused to come out until after most of the guests had left. As a toddler, he would go to his bedroom and take a nap at nap time, even if we had friends over for a play date. To this day, if given the option, he will choose to stay home instead of going out anywhere.

The advice I was given when my severely introverted son was a baby and young toddler, was to continue to bring him to a childcare setting and let him scream at first. I was assured that each time he would improve until he was comfortable. The caregivers at MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) were very sweet and experienced, so I listened to their advice.....at first. We tried this for 3 MOPS meetings in a row. He screamed so much during the first meeting, that the meeting was disrupted by so many Moms going to check to see if it was their child who was upset. The Moms who knew it was my son would report back to me about how he was doing and what the caregivers were doing to try to comfort him. I ended up leaving early that day, to go pick him up and end the stress for everyone.

During the 2nd attempt, the caregivers got him to calm down a little by taking him for a stroll outside. This also cut down on the amount of noise indoors. Every time they tried to bring him back inside, he screamed hysterically all over again. He calmed down when he was strolled over to the playground where Jersey #2 was playing with her class. So, they let him play there a while. As soon as he was brought to the nursery again, he started screaming. Once again, I picked him up early. The caregivers informed me that even though he calmed down with his sister, he could not join her class because he was not potty trained. I was beginning to lose faith in their methods, and my gut told me that this was not good for him.

He began screaming as soon as we entered the hallway of the nursery for the 3rd meeting. He knew where we were going, and he was not showing any signs of cooperation in the slightest. Quite the opposite, his hysterics seemed worse, if that is even possible. I kissed him goodbye, handed him over to the caregiver, and went to the meeting. My mind raced through options for how to re-arrange my husband's work schedule so I could still attend MOPS, because I really enjoyed the fellowship with other Moms. I knew there was no way that Jersey #3 was going to warm up to the childcare arrangement. My gut was telling me this was not the way to manage him. Apparently the nursery staff felt the same way, because they decided to just bring him to me within the first hour. They could do nothing with him to get him to calm down, so they threw in the towel. They were out of ideas. Their response only confirmed my thought that conventional wisdom was not working for this kid. He needed something more from me. I was able to attend a few more MOPS meetings without him, on days when my husband could take a morning off work to be home with Jersey #3. After that, I gave up MOPS and stayed home with my son. I gave up Bible study classes, homeschool co-ops, ladies organizations, and everything else that required me to leave Jersey #3 in childcare. I decided that his needs took priority over my needs. That is motherhood.

Jersey #3 continued to grow and develop, while remaining by my side. He learned how to interact with adults and peers in social situations, secure in the knowledge that I was not going anywhere. He had a real comfortable routine going. When he was 3 years old, we decided to stretch him out of his comfort zone a little and nudge him into some higher independence. He was ready. We used gymnastics class for this training. Our family had been going to the same gym for gymnastics classes from the month Jersey #3 was born. He was comfortable with the gym and the staff. He was used to watching his sisters during their classes, and even participating in a parent-tot program with me. The preschool program began at age 3, and the kids attended on their own, with the parents observing from the sidelines. At first, Jersey #3 refused to attend class on his own. The Referee and I sat him down and explained to him that it was time for him to go to "big boy" gymnastics class now that he was 3. We laid out our expectations for how he was suppose to listen to and obey his coach, and participate in the class. We let him mull that information over for a couple days, an then I began the excited talk about how much fun class was going to be in a few days. That did the trick. He ran into the gym and ran right into class and participated the entire time. The coach actually pulled me aside and asked me what I did that changed his attitude so much. I explained that we had come to the conclusion that this was the time to stretch him. If we didn't, then he would become a socially wimpy "Mama's boy." I was confident that I had given him that extra security he needed as an infant and toddler, but he was showing all the skills and abilities to be more socially independent as a preschooler. He just need the boundary and the encouragement, and I was certain his confidence would soar. I was careful to introduce one independent class at a time and let him adjust at his pace. We started with gymnastics, then eased into Awana Cubbies. At first, I remained in his Cubbies class until he was comfortable with the environment. His teachers remarked that he was a completely different child by the end of the program than he was at the beginning. That year of being 3 years old was a time of great social blooming for Jersey #3. Now, he can enter a new class of peers, nearly as independent and confident as his older sisters have always been. He won't bloom into an extrovert like they are, but he has learned how to conduct himself appropriately in social situations. He just prefers to be at home with his family. (He is a lot like his VERY introverted Daddy!)

The trauma that Jersey #3 put me through was great preparation for Jersey #4. She was not content enough to just be with me, she was only content at home! She did not let anyone else hold her, or even look at her for that matter. She would look away if anyone tried to talk to her. She did not smile at anyone but her immediate family. Any time we tried to go out to activities or play dates, we always ended up leaving with Jersey #4 screaming. When she was done, she was done, and she would not calm down until she was back in the comfort of her own home. I had already given up all of my personal endeavors for Jersey #3, so I only had to extend that time away from such things in order to manage Jersey #4. This time around, I had the personal security of knowing that trusting my gut was best. Jersey #3 eventually bloomed, so I was certain that Jersey #4 would too.

A lot of friends and family asked if Jersey #4 even talked when she was approaching 2. She was a chatterbox at home, but did not speak a word in public. She did not smile at anyone. She did not even look at anyone. She ignored the world.....until recently. Starting at age 2 1/2 a light switch flipped somewhere and Jersey #4 gained instant independence. Out of the blue, she started talking to people at church and friends we see every week. Last month, she participated in Awana Puggles on her own, without me in the room with her. A couple weeks ago, she informed me that she did not want me to go to Sunday school class with her. She told me to go to my own class and to sit quiet and no talking during class. This week, she played with the other kids in the nursery at our homeschool co-op and interacted with the other teachers, and didn't need me for anything. She smiled at her teacher during snack time. She told me that when she is 3 she is going to the big girl class at Co-op (speaking of the 3-year old classroom.)

There is just something magical about age 3, for severely introverted children.

Thankfully, Jersey #5 is much more extroverted and social like his oldest sisters. He is almost as socially independent as Jersey #4 already. That is a welcome break for an extreme extrovert like me. I am glad I took the time and care to shelter my two introverts to let them develop social skills at their own pace. But, now, I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Bring on the social activities!

High Aspirations

This is a child whose aspirations have no limits. I hope he stays this way throughout his entire life...

Food & Finances Friday--Casserole Surprise

After spending a couple weeks making many meals for families in need recently (I am not sure what hit so many families all at once, but it seemed like we knew a bunch who were dealing with something intense and needed a meal for their family), I have really grown to appreciate casseroles.

Casseroles can feed many people. They can also feed hungry, growing children a ton of food in one meal. (Sometimes I wonder just how does my 4-year old engulf so much food in one sitting.) Casseroles are flexible. I can substitute ingredients if I am missing something, and it doesn't ruin the dish. Casseroles are simple to assemble and easy to double. I can make one pan for a family in need and another pan for my own family, at the same time. I love the efficiency of being able to feed two families the same meal like that. It helps me serve others without detracting from the needs of my own family. Casseroles can be very inexpensive, which really helps a family on a budget.

After asking my friends for some of their favorite easy casserole dishes, I started to consider that there must be a formula for making a casserole. I think I might have it figured out. A basic casserole appears to have a handful of standard ingredients:

• a pasta source

• a sauce source

• a meat source (unless it is a vegetarian dish)

• a vegetable source

• an additional splash of flavor

• an additional liquid to blend it all together and keep it from drying out in the oven

• a topping

It is a simple formula. Yet, I have successfully messed it up! I realize that I am proudly to the point of being able to follow a recipe and cook nice meals for my family. But, I am NOT ready to be experimenting in the kitchen....just yet. I've still got a learning curve there.

After successfully following a simple broccoli and chicken casserole recipe four times, I decided to tweak it one night. I had some BBQ shredded chicken that was not a hit, because the BBQ sauce was too wild for our family. I did not want to waste all that chicken by throwing it out. So, I thought it would be smart to use the BBQ chicken up in a casserole, hoping that the casserole would tame it a bit. I was a little too ambitious to substitute items from the original casserole. The final product did not look anything like the ones I had made before. I used the BBQ chicken instead of regular chicken, and did not add mustard, because the BBQ sauce had enough of a flavor kick. I used spaghetti pasta instead of the rotini pasta. I used green beans instead of broccoli.

My new casserole concoction was certainly not as pretty. My family was a good sport about it though. They asked what it was. When I shared what was in it, my husband laughed. He was highly entertained by my attempt to use up the chicken with the yucky BBQ sauce. The casserole was not too bad. The boys in the family liked it enough to clear their plates. The 2-year old was very vocal with her opinion that it did NOT taste good. Since I don't plan to use that BBQ sauce anymore, I don't plan to repeat that particular casserole ever again.

The Gift of Medicine

A couple from our church presented me with a bag filled with all of these children's health goodies. It was a gift from their family to ours. We are so blessed.

Due to an employer change situation, they ended up with money in a health savings account that needed to be spent by an early deadline or else it would be gone. While they were listing out the things they could spend the money on, such as new glasses and getting wisdom teeth pulled, they also thought about ways they could bless others.

They had Jersey #2's heart condition on their hearts, so they looked for things that might help us care for her after her surgery. Their ideas included a forehead thermometer, and a blood pressure cuff. I am touched by their thoughtfulness and generosity.

One of the greatest benefits to being part of a church family is the comfort of knowing we will not go through life's challenges alone. We are loved. Our church family prays for us, encourages us, and blesses us with helpful gifts.

Such as the gift of children's medicine.

Snuggie

We enjoyed some additional Christmas excitement recently, when a box arrived in the mail from Nana (The Referee's Mom). The gifts were from Nana's Mom.

Snuggies for all!

A Snuggie is a blanket with sleeves. I've been told these advertise on TV a lot. I had only heard of them, and had not seen one until the day they arrived.

A blanket is a good gift idea for us. We often lounge in the living room under a blanket. Our house is quite drafty. Plus, we keep the thermostat low to cut down on utility expenses.

The kids have seen a Snuggie commercial, so they were thrilled when they opened their gifts. They read the box and shared with me that you can stay warm and keep your hands free! They told me that I could wear my Snuggie while I am typing on my laptop.

Nana had the brilliant forthought to iron on a decal with each child's initial, so that we know which Snuggie belongs to which kid. We've got 3 pink for the girls and 2 blue for the boys.

The kids tried them on with the opening in the back, like the box shows. They also tried them on with the opening in the front, like a robe. Jersey #1 tied a sash around hers to turn it into a robe. Jersey #3 wore his to the table and immediately spilled his snack on it, so I had to wash it within an hour of its arrival.

To add to the excitement, Nana sent a Snuggie to me and The Referee too! Mine is pink, his is blue.

Both The Referee and Jersey #2 wear their Snuggie all the time. The Referee even wears his to bed sometimes. He enjoys relaxing in his recliner covered in his Snuggie in the evenings. Jersey #2 wears hers around the house, and even asks to take it with her in the van when we go out. She is a walking advertisement about how she can stay warm and keep her hands free.

I am amused. A blanket with sleeves. It is a brilliant concept, and they are quite popular.

I am not a fan, personally. I like a blanket, for sure. I like to use the Snuggie as a blanket. It is soft and warm. But, I do not wear it as designed. I do not like to feel constricted or confined in any way. I hardly wear a jacket unless I am at risk of freezing. I don't like long sleeves. I don't wear turtlenecks. I tend to wear my shirts baggy, because I like room to move. So, a blanket with sleeves just did not entice me the way it amazed other members of my family.

Jersey #5 doesn't wear his much either. Actually, he was more impressed with the box everything was shipped in...

Water fountains

Jersey #5 has discovered water fountains....

I spend a large amount of time trying to keep him out of the dog's water dish as it is. He loves water. Now that he has discovered that there is a drinking fountain near almost every public restroom, he is drawn to them like a magnet.

Most of the time, he is too short to operate them. But, the water fountains at the gym where Jersey #2 plays basketball are kid-sized, with a step-stool below. If ever I lose him in the gym, I know to check at the water fountains first.

He has not yet figured out how to push the lever and drink from the fountain, at the same time as splashing in the water near the drain. I suppose it is difficult to drink and splash at the same time.

The First Step is a Leap of Faith...

I received a little surprise in the mail on Friday. It was a letter reminding me that it is time to call the Children's Heart Clinic to schedule Jersey #2's next cardiology evaluation.

I stopped in my tracks. Took a deep breath. And thought, Really? Is it time to be thinking about this already?

I looked at the calendar on the kitchen wall as if I have been missing the passing of time. January is now over. I knew that she would have her next evaluation in late March or early April. I also know that the clinic is very busy, and likes to schedule in advance. Scheduling is only the first step. I also have to contact her pediatrician to get a referral sent over. Yes, indeed, it is time to be thinking about that if everything is going to flow properly.

I didn't want to think about it, so I left the notice on the counter and ignored it all weekend.

I'm not ready.

I know that this is the first step this year toward surgery. The instructions we were given by the cardiologist were to try to stay out of the hospital all winter (meaning stay healthy and away from the germs), and then visit her again in the Spring. It is that clinic visit that will get all the surgery preparation gears turning. The surgery date could be as early as 4-6 weeks following that clinic visit. Scheduling that clinic appointment is the first step.

I'm not ready.

That first step is a giant leap of faith for me.

I'm starting to panic. I'm continuing to pray. I'm ready to cry. I'm not ready. I'm scared.

A friend innocently asked at church yesterday if we had a surgery date. I immediately blurted out my confession about setting aside the reminder notice and putting it off due to my own insecurities. Pastor's sermon had been convicting my heart, so I was already a little hyped up on the subject.

There are two pieces of Pastor's sermon that won't leave my mind. The first is the concept of waiting on God's timing. I've always struggled with wanting to plan and be in control. This surgery time line has been a huge time of growth for me to wait. To let go, and let God handle it. The second part that struck me so intensely was his description of eagles. The image of a mother eagle nudging her baby bird out of the nest to teach it to fly, and then flying below it to guide it as it learns. I know God will hold me in the palm of his hands and guide me through this. But, first, I must obey by stepping out on faith.

I've been using my fearful energy to budget for the upcoming travel and treatment expenses. No matter how many times I go over the numbers, I just can't seem to get our savings account far enough ahead to cover it all. Somehow, I comforted myself with the idea that I won't have to worry about the surgery until the finances are in place. Once again, I see that I am still trying to do this in my own might.

Well, God has the funding worked out too. Our church blessed us with the offer to cover our airfare. They also plan to take up a love offering one month, to help with some of the other travel expenses. I am still in shock over this announcement. It is certainly an answer to prayer. God gave me a big nudge toward the edge of the nest last night, while I was working on our income tax return. It turns out that our refund is over twice what I was expecting (I am no CPA, that is for sure!) The amount will cover all of our projected out-of-pocket medical expenses for her care, that are not covered by our insurance! I am seeing firsthand that when we are faithful to God with our finances, He certainly supplies all our needs.

I am all out of excuses now. It is time to take a great leap of faith. It is time to step out of nest...out of my comfort zone...and plummet into the unknown.

It is time to call the clinic and schedule that cardiac evaluation. Everything is going according to God's plans. He knows what the future will bring. I know that his hands will be guiding me through it all.

But, I must take the first step. Step out on Faith...