Puppy Boyfriends

 We took our puppies to the vet to be spayed.  It was a big day for them.  In addition to the surgery, they also received a microchip, rabies vaccination, city license, and got their nails trimmed.  They are resting comfortably at home now.  They are exhausted.

I am exhausted too.

It is only partially due to the puppy care.

Most of my exhaustion is mental exhaustion from trying to explain spaying to my kids. 

I clearly see why infant and childcare books all end their material by age 5.  There are so many things that are tough to explain to kids who are older than 5, but younger than adolescence. 

With my 2 year old and 4 year old, it is simple to explain that the puppies have to go to the puppy doctor, which is called a veterinarian.  They accept my statement that the puppies need rest after their doctor visit.  It all makes sense to them.  Life is simple.

Things are not so simple with my older 3.  For the most part, Jersey #1 remained quiet, and absorbed the conversation.  Her 6-year-old brother and  7-year-old sister were doing a fine job of asking all the questions that were probably coming to her mind too.  They aimed questions at me like a firing squad.

I tried to explain to the children that we had to take the puppies to the vet for surgery, to be spayed, so that they could not run off, find a boyfriend, and have puppies.

Why don't you want the puppies to have more puppies?

• Because there are already too many puppies who need homes, so we don't want to add to that problem by having more puppies.

What is spaying?

• The vet will remove the uterus from the female dog, so that babies can't grow in there.  A dog can't have a baby dog without the uterus to grow the baby.  In humans, the surgery to remove the uterus is called a hysterectomy.  A woman can't grow a baby after her uterus is removed.

What if the puppies were boys?

• Boy dogs get neutered so that they can't make puppies.

What is neutered?

• The testicles are removed from the sac that hangs behind the penis.  (At this point, The Referee said he is not sure he can ride in the van with us anymore, because these conversations make him uncomfortable).  

How would a boy dog make puppies?  Girls dogs are the ones who have puppies!

• Remember it takes both a Mom & a Dad to make a baby.  Everyone has 2 parents.

Oh, yeah.  (Whew!  They did not ask me to elaborate on that one today).

What if our puppies want to have a boyfriend even after they have the surgery?

• The surgery will help keep them from wanting to run away with a boyfriend.  They are still allowed to have dog friends.  But, our puppies have to stay at our home and live with us.  They are not allowed to run away with their boyfriends.

In hindsight, I think the conversation went Ok.  It was definitely an improvement over the time when Jersey #2 asked me why the nativity set was missing the surgeon who delivered baby Jesus.  (I had delivered her youngest 2 siblings via c-section, so she assumed that was how all babies arrived.)  It was quite challenging to explain vaginal birth to a kindergartner!