When Opposites Attract

The Referee and I are about as opposite as two people can be. It is more than just the differences between men and women. I am an extreme extrovert. He is an extreme introvert. I like sweet snacks. He likes salty snacks. I am an early bird, who requires a good night's sleep. He is a night owl who acts like sleep is optional, but not required to function. I like things neat, organized, and everything in its place. He decorates with cords and clutter. I would eat meat with every meal. He would call a salad a meal. I am an optimist. He is a pessimist. I count my blessings. He complains about everything (even things he likes). I like movies with a sports theme, where the underdog team works hard and wins in the end. He likes science fiction, adventure, explosions, and a good fight. I would love to throw out the television. He watches TV while playing a computer game on his laptop, along with music running from his computer. I am a Do-er. He is a Think-er. I am sensitive and emotional. He keeps his emotions and responses steady.

Clearly he is flawed! Since I like myself the way I am, then his ways must be wrong. I wasted a lot of time trying to change him to be more like me. It never worked. He is not like me. He is not me at all.

I used to focus on his lack of excitement during the good times. Where's your joy? He'd look at me confused and say he was happy. I'd look at him confused, because if you are happy, aren't you smiling from ear to ear, ready to burst? He thought I was crazy, because no, he has never had the desire to behave in such a manner. It took many years of marriage for me to realize that there is no way that this man who can keep his emotions steady during tough times is going to be able to let them burst during joyous times. It doesn't work that way. So, he goes through life as a steady line.....I bounce through life in waves and troughs.

Thankfully, our paths still meet in the middle.